he seriously didnt text me back yesterday…ahh well i guess two can play that game. I thought he was gunna text me later that night but no reply. Even if i dont get back to him on time i will still eventually reply. And today didnt even text me not even a good morning lol i guess he cant always text me…I know somehow he comes around when he can. Hes probably working or doesnt have his phone to text thats what i keep telling myself. aghhhh. But my birthday is coming soon. This is seriously my bday week. If i dont hear from him soon im gunna be totally bummed…because i told him when my bday is and he knows its a special day. He said he wouldnt forget. But i am not gunna come to him..if he wants me he better show it..when its my bday im gunna have fun. I tried telling him about the st pattricks parade but he didnt say much..aw well im gunna look haaawt in my lime green playsuit…take loads of pics lol with my sis and some of her friends..some guys too aha ;p I may really be falling for him but im gunna keep my eyes wide open..its time for someone to chase after me.
today i got my haircut but i had to get a lady who thinks she knows it all..first off i showed her a pic of how i wanted my layers…and she told me that her hair is fake…i showed her a pic of lauren curtis from youtube and her hair is definitely not fake! then she went on how my hair is dry when she was shampooing my hair like i just had to let her do my hair all i wanted was a trim and layers.Then when she was blow drying my hair she made a comment about my roots..like i wanted my haircut before i dyed my hair…thats why i just let my roots be…trying say i cant lighten dark hair with just brown hair dye like i didnt know :p i dont know whats with these know it all hairdressers. I was thinking i would get a better experience bc it was at a salon but i guess there all the same. Definitely not going back to that salon. Shes lucky i still gave her tip because i am such a nice person..she did take her time with my hair tho and straightened..its now super soft.but thats the only good thing. Like the experience and friendliness was not there…especially if you are working at a salon. Ahhh it makes me think i so need to start going to beauty school….being an hairdresser would be perfect for me :)
omg i dont know whether i should text him or not. I mean i want to but then i dont. he texted me yesterday and it made me oh so happy. hearing from him just gets me so excited but he doesnt even know. I am listening to daydreaming by ariana grande cuz thats exactly how i feel. I just wanna love him. omg i am crazy. I had to tell him that I miss him..and surprisingly he said he misses me too. I just cant believe this he always proves me wrong…like should i have not been worried…what if we are truly meant to be and i need for this to happen naturally. But i just want to be cute with him.Maybe i should just text him tomorrw cuz its getting late & i dont wanna be bummed if he doesnt reply. I just wish he wasnt so busy and would just call me cuz i really miss his voice. ugh. I just have to be positive that in time he will be mine and i will be his. Its crazy how it started from a crush and now ive turned into this.
omg who needs a boyfriend when you got the gym ;p i went to the gym today & it was amazing! It really made me feel positive & forget about whats been bringing me down. Ive been stressing over a guy which i still have no idea whats going on but i really dont need to worry…I got my fitness goals to be more concerned and focused on…ugh and besides if you snooze you loose..if hes ignoring me its his loss. I am gunna keep being amazing haha. I am so thankful for my trainer for keeping me motivated!!! today was better than the last few days. So i am gunna keep dedicating myself to the gym.No freaking guy will bring me down..i just cant let myself down like that! No matter how special or amazing he made me feel. Besides i know if it is meant to be it will be..just gotta keep being positive! Ah well today my trainer gave me the meal plan so i gotta start eating clean…but good thing he came up with amazing foods that i love haha…he already knows im all about pizza aha ;p today i ate pizza oops. but omg im gunna have to start being motivated to cook…we’ll see how this goes aha.
Feeling down again about my crush…I guess thats when you know its a crush when it starts to consume you & you really cant do nothing about it…but i guess wait for a sign. But i hate this i hate having a crush…having someone i admire so much when i fall for someone it hits me real hard eventhough it took me a while to admit these feelings cuz i hate feeling this WAY…thats why i have ignored him in the past because i knew he had potential and it scares me because i am trying to prevent another heartbreak because I cant go through another disappointment. And i am always the one that hurts.Its not that i am afraid to love again…but thats just it i want to be in love & maybe thats what makes guys run or hide. I have played it off like i dont care but if you look in my eyes i really do. I dont wanna seem that i am afraid of commitment…i just dont want to waste my time. If i go out and spend time with a guy it means i really do feel for them. For me its always been about falling in love. And i think i have fallen and i dont know how to get back up…now more than ever i want to be with him…because we shared an emotional and physical connection and that is very rare for me. But why hasnt he called…its like he somehow lost interest in me. But am i overacting? maybe i need to take it slow…I know i should let him come to me. He will come around if he cares…and almost everytime he did. But somehow this feels different. Because we have meet…its not just this on going texting and talking on the phone. But now its like i get hardly any of that. I wanted to hear from him today but at the end of today im ending up disappointed. My best friend tells me i am too pretty for him and maybe shes right…i mean i know that could be true but that doesnt change the connection i feel i have with him. I feel almost like i am complete with him…like i know i can be myself…and i no longer feel shy. Thats an amazing feeling. Its like i am happy yet i am sad because i fancy him so so much,